What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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