I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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