I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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