We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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