I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
