i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
you had me at cake vodka
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Randomize
