The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize