fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
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Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
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i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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