He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
