Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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