woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
