Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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