Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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