Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
