Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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