Please, let me fuck your mom
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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