You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
