the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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