All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
