you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
