i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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