Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
