Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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