i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
id be glad to
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
