Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
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I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
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Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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