Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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