Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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