If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize