She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
