Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
