Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
