i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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