The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
