Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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