the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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