considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
