God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
