He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
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I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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