How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
