Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
