his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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