I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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