I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize