I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
