I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
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You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
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I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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