she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
well you can't waste a boner
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize