That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I have fence marks all over my body
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
