Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize