so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
