uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
