I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
