Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
